Wednesday, Feb. 23, 2005
The Good Little Kitty and Her Semi-Retarded Owner
Once upon a time there was a sweet, fluffy kitty cat and she lived with her semi-retarded person in the former attic of an old house in an artic tundra known as "Ohio".
One day the sweet, fluffy kitty needed to use her litter box rather badly.
The kitty went to the rivate closet her semi-retarded person had set up just for her to have her moments in and was upset to find the closet was closed!
Oh no! What should the poor, fluffy kitty do?
Well most kitties would use the bathroom on the floor to teach their semi-retarded people a lesson.
But not this kitty, she knew it was wrong.
So what did I kitty do?
She waited to use her litter box almost 20 hours while her semi-retarded owner went about his normal retarded routine.
Finally, in the afternoon, the semi-retarded person woke up to watch and movie and feed her highly understandable lust for Val Kilmer.
The kitty so happy to see her semi-retarded person awake, went to her and begged her to get her fat, lazy ass out of bed and slide the closet door open a crack so she could get to her litter box.
The semi-retarded person, however, was too stupid to realize what the kitty was saying and followed her into the hallway with the magic litter box closet grumbling and being grouchy with the kitty.
Finally the kitty went directly to the closet and showed the retarded person that the door to the magic closet was shut.
"Oh shit kitty, I'm so sorry!" Said the retard when she realized what she had done.
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!" Said the kitty as she ran into the closet to her littler box.
The retarded person the began to look around for where the kitty may have used the bathroom while she couldn't get to her box.
When the person realized that the kitty had not made any no no's anywhere and had actually held it all night she was amazed and in awe of the little kitty.
Fifteen minutes later, when the kitty was done in the closet, she came out to thank the retard for finally opening the door and ask her what the hell her problem was.
The retarded person scopped the kitty up and showered her with affection and praise for being so good and holding it all night long.
And the kitty was given chicken flavored snacks she loved.
And they lived happlily ever after.
At least until the retard does something else as equally stupid.
harlemrain at 4:30 pm