Tuesday, May. 25, 2004
Poo
I feel the need tonight to discuss a topic that's not...shall we say... lady like....
My bowls.
Turn back now, after this line I can't be responsible.
You have been warned people, this ain't gonna be pretty.
Now, I have never had the most dependable or regular bowls. In fact my body seems to go out of its way to be anything by regular.
I know my guts have been goin haywire for a while because of the drastic changes caused by one former body part Mr. Gallbladder.
He was removed almost two years ago now, so I think it's about time my intestines, bladder and colon get togeth and figure out how to work together peacefully without Mr. Gallbladder there to mediate with digestive juices.
You miss him, I understand, 18 years is a long time to be together, but he was defective and was on his way to killing me thus he had to be fired.
In just this month I have gone from being seriously constipated for the first time in probably 6 or 7 years, to completely liquid diaherra (I did warn you this was gross).
Now at first I'll be honest, the thought of being constipated wasn't that bad to me, being I haven't had a single soild movement since July of 2002 when I first started vomiting spartaically and Mr.Gallbladder decided he was gonna be all backed up and "tryin to kill The Lauren" like.
So yeah, the thought of a clean get away without using half a roll was a bit exciting.
Until I didn't have a moment for like four days.
Then I got cranky.
My bowls have been all outta sync since my last week of school.
I thought maybe it was my body decompressing from the stress...then thought maybe I was fighting a bug....but now I just think it's annoying and I wiah my body would make up it's damn mind.
The last few days have been particulary unenjoyable.
Yesterday I felt nauseous and had a time or two where I was sure I was gonna throw up and today I had diaherra after eating 6 twizzlers.
Who the heck gets the trots from candy??
Lauren does. The rest of the world eats junk food and gets stopped up, I get quick evactation.
(@_o)
I feel bad for anyone who has to live with me.
My life seems to revolve around my bowl movements.
Sad yes, but I'd like ot see someone ese deal with these peoblems and no become preocupied with their lower functions.
Word to yo muther.
harlemrain at 10:49 pm